Rocks Off Express

We're running an air-conditioned, bathroom-equipped, sound-system-stacked, TV-screen-rockin party bus from NYC to and from the shows. That means you don't have to worry about finding a ride, staying sober, dealing with the scumbags on public transportation, or the crowded-ass, AC-free, no- bathroom, sound system, or TV having, might-or-might-not-come shuttle buses back to the train station after the show. You won't even have to learn where the hell "Holmdel, New Jersey" or "Wantagh, NY" actually is -- that's what our professional drivers are for. Most crucially -- and we can't stress this part enough -- there'll be no more drawing straws to see which one of your friends has to stay sober. Really, all you've gotta do is buy a ticket, show up, stumble into and out of the venue, and we'll take care of the rest. The fact that you don't have to spend one second "thinking" makes this the ultimate no-brainer.